This Doesn't Rock

I don't know whose brilliant idea it was to include aging, wrinkly musicians with the models in this year's Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue, but I'll just say it like it is: seeing Steven Tyler rocking out with a model (in this case, Bar Refaeli) is just not a turnon. Other not-so-exciting singers in the portfolio: Gnarls Barkley, Panic at the Disco, and Jimmy Buffett. Clearly, it was fun for them — not so much for us. I remember the days when it was just the models in the swimsuit issue. When Kathy Ireland and Elle MacPherson would smile out at me and all the cold of winter would suddenly disappear. Those were the good ole days. This Steven Tyler and Cee-Lo crap just ain't hot. Not that it's going to stop me from buying the issue, mind you (that Beyoncé cover alone is worth the price), but I wanted to bitch about it anyway.