I'm Too Sexy for People

DAMMIT! I was overlooked again for the title of People magazine's Sexiest Man Alive. I figured when the Boston Phoenix left me off their 'Unsexiest' list that it was a good sign and I actually had a chance. But now People has gone and given the honor to Matt Damon of all people. Jeez Louise. What's a guy gotta do to get a little lovin' from those folks? At least I can still say I was Time's Person of the Year. That's probably a better honor anyway. And I suppose it could be worse. At least I wasn't named one of the Frigid 50.