For the Kids

When my niece, Abby, was born, my sister and brother-in-law told me they were committed to visiting Boston twice a year so that I could be more a part of her life, and so she could see where I live. They've done just that. Now that I have two nephews, the same philosophy holds true. And this weekend, the boys — and their sister and their parents — came to visit me. Like Abby's first visit, it was a low-key weekend, but that doesn't mean we didn't have fun.

We took Abby — and her friends Quackers and Quackers' Big Sister — on a Duck Tour (one item that was on my Summer 2011 To-Do List). We took Abby to In a Pickle, where she had M&M Pancakes (and her mommy and I had yummy Nutella Stuffed French Toast). We ate marshmallows (because that's what you do on vacation, apparently). I showed Abby my office and introduced her to some coworkers. We went to a BBQ. We walked around downtown, and Abby rode a carousel on Boston Common. And the boys? They rode everywhere in their stroller, sleeping often (and sometimes not often enough), attracting attention and smiles from all who passed them by. I think they enjoyed themselves. I know I enjoyed showing them off.

One day not long from now, Marc and Ian will be a bit more engaged in the trip to visit their uncle, like their sister is. For now, it's still a good time. I look forward to their next visit, a few months from now.

You're Sleeping Your Lives Away

Dear Marc and Ian,

I know how tough it must be to be two months old. After all, I was a baby once too, and I lived through it with your big sister, Abby. All you do is sleep, eat, cry, and poop, over and over again. Without even saying what you want, people pamper you and attend to your every need. Yes, I know. It's very hard work, and that's why you're always sleeping. But I have to tell you, boys: sleeping all the time means you're missing out on some really cool stuff.

For example, yesterday your mommy and daddy threw you a big "welcome to the world" brunch party. All kinds of people came to meet you — more than 100 relatives, friends, other children (lots of other children), and politicians were there. Yes, politicians. "Uncle" Joe, the senator, and "aunt" Hadassah were actually in the building (I saw them). There was a delicious spread of food: Cinnamon swirl French toast, blintzes, mac and cheese, lox, etc. There was even a tasty cake from Crumbs, your mommy's favorite cupcake place (mine too). Your big sister wore such a pretty dress, and she was beaming with pride whenever people asked about her little brothers. The place was decorated so well, with fancy tablecloths (you can thank your grandma for those), and balloons, and a personalized chocolate bar at every seat. Some beautiful things were said about where you got your names from. There was a lot of love in the room. People were happy and seemed to have a really good time. It was truly a special day. Your mommy and daddy did such a nice job putting it all together.

And because you guys slept through most of it, I just wanted you to know that you really missed out. Thankfully, I ate enough of the brunch food for the three of us, so don't worry about that. And I took a bunch of pictures for your mommy and daddy, so there's documentation of how great it all was. But next time, you're gonna have to be more involved.

Wake up!

Love,
Uncle Martin

They're Here!

Unless it's, you know, a booty call or something, you never want the phone to ring after 12 a.m. Especially if you've been out, and you're, well, not sober. Because when people call after midnight, it's usually not for a good reason.

But sometimes the phone rings after midnight for a good reason. A very good reason.

Such was the case this past Tuesday night, when the phone rang and I learned that I had two new nephews. Yes, they were a few weeks early. I guess Marc and Ian just couldn't wait to meet their uncle and they arrived at just 31 weeks. I was in Las Vegas when I got the call (and yes, I had had a few drinks), so I was sorry that I couldn't be there to welcome them, like I was when my niece, Abby, was born. But neither were my folks or my sister's in-laws. The whole thing apparently happened so quickly, so unexpectedly, and so soon that no one could truly prepare. (The fact that my sister and brother-in-law had picked up their new minivan just days earlier was pure luck.)

So ... now I have two little nephews: Marc Owen (4 pounds) and Ian Benjamin (3 pounds, 15 ounces), who were born at 2:27 a.m. and 2:28 a.m. on January 26. I'm not going to get to meet them for another few days, and I can hardly wait.

Two boys. How cool. How fun. How long do I have to wait till we can play wiffle ball, or till they can crawl all over me and try to pin me to the ground? These guys are gonna be trouble, and it's gonna be awesome.

Oh, and in case you're wondering about Abby ... she's handling it all just fine. She loves the idea of being a big sister, and loves the tshirts, the hats, and the bracelets that say "Big Sister." We'll see how well she handles it when Marc and Ian — or "Mookie" and "Alex," as she calls them — come home from the hospital in a few weeks. I think she's gonna be great. And if she needs a little love and attention, she knows who she can count on to give it to her. (Hint: It's me.)

And just for the record, Abby, Marc, and Ian can call me any time.

Twice Is Nice

Minnesota has them. Doublemint has them. Jennifer Lopez has them. The Olsen family has them too. And in March, so will my sister and brother-in-law. That's right: I'm going to be an uncle again — and again — because my sister is pregnant with twins! Identical ones.

You may recall how excited I was when my sister was pregnant with her first child. Well, double it. I knew I'd be an uncle again someday, but twins is just so cool. It's two for the price of one. It's two times as much fun. It's twice as nice. And one day, when I've got my niece, Abby, and my two new nieces or nephews (I won't know which for a couple weeks) chasing me all over the yard or crawling all over me or sleeping on me ... well, that'll just be the best. And it'll also be fun to figure out which is which, or to dress them up as Thing 1 and Thing 2 or Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, or to make all the obvious other twins jokes. Ha ha ha ... I'm already laughing at the fun I'm going to have with these two.

Holy cow. If you thought I was a doting uncle before, just wait until I've got three kids to spoil. It's gonna be awesome. I'm so excited.